a moment of falling in love

well, here I am, home from camp. and it was insanely nice to shower and ....yes, blow-dry my hair when I got home. I guess nothing happened while I was gone, but somehow I think things happened, just the unsaid, small kinds of things that will eventually make a difference.

So for some reason I decided to leave my cellphone at home. And although I felt really weird and cut off from everything, I am so glad I did it. I became one of those crazy people who just disappear into the mountains for awhile to think. And think I did. After a few days, I kind of had a clearer picture of my life, and it seemed to me that I have been putting way too much energy into all of the wrong things lately. Sometimes those small things really just don't matter.

The very best was last night. Some girls in my ward and I had been out doing mischief at around 1:30, and we took the long way coming back along this road. We kind of came around this bend and looked up, and it was amazing. Like, breathtaking-amazing. The trees were insanely tall, and stark white against the black sky. And the stars up there are brilliant, the only way to describe them. I've never seen so many all at once, it was beautiful. And to top it all off, the mountain way ahead of us had this tiny halo of pink light around the edges somehow, like it was glowing. I couldn't believe it. We were all off in another world, and didn't speak for the longest time while we walked. And it was just one of those moments where you can't believe you're so lucky to be alive and you can't believe how okay things are right at that moment. I was in love with life, I'm pretty sure. So I still feel sort of like that, I guess. That's the best way I can explain it. So if I seem weird or distant, that's probably why, my mind's still off on a mountain somewhere.

Love, and I missed all of you a lot, Jennifer