I went swimming for the first time in forever on Thursday. It was fantastic. I got there sort of latish, so there was no one around. The lights were off, except for the pool lights, under the water. It was perfectly quiet. The water was just waiting for me, a flawless, smooth sheet of crystal clear blue. Sooo perfect. Amazing. I knew that it would be the day I finally conquered the pool, then, because I knew it had to happen on a perfect night like this, and everything would have to be just right.
I dipped in, and it was cold, but not bad, perfect once you were underwater. I pushed off the wall, and realized I could see all the way down the length of the pool, the water was still perfectly still; the ripples I created hadn't caught up to me yet. I started stroking and forgot how good it felt to swim. I thought it would be hard for me, but as I made the first fifty, then 100, then 150, it was fine. I had only planned on doing a 200, but I thought, why not 300? one hundred later my arms are starting to burn a little, and my head's starting to feel a little light. I made it to three hundred, then realized that I was going to make it to five hundred. That's like, unheard of for me. I HATE five hundreds. By now I'm getting really tired, and starting to think about how if I passed out, no one would find me in the pool before I died. I kept swimming.
Four hundred hurts a lot, four hundred fifty makes you numb, and the last fifty goes by unnoticed. The last twenty-five, I didn't even think I had the option to stop after I finished it. silly me. Like I'd be swimming, all numb like I was, forever. I did stop though, and lifted myself out of the pool. My arms felt funny. My legs felt even weirder. jelly. I thought my muscles had probably become some sort of slush. i was so proud of myself. I stood there, looking at the now unperfect water, knowing I had conquered it. For now.
After that I sprinted a little, did some backstroke and fly, then kicks. Dolphin kicks only on your back...ouch. By that time, I started to get "paranoid indian" (haha don't ask) syndrome, and started seeing people out of the corner of my eye, watching me from the pool chairs. when I'd put my head under water, I'd hear doors shutting and chairs moving. I got scaarrrred. lol. finally I left, but I swear, there were people in the empty room. lol. Crazy me.
Much love, Jennifer
2 comments:
and that's why i dont' wanna swim, and don't worry i do that "paranoid indian" thing all the time....that's not a good thing, is it?
well you're a lot better of a swimmer than i could ever be ill tell you that. a 500 would seriously and im not joking probably kill me. yes, im serious. haha and you have a lot more determination than i do. haha. im not sure i understand the paranoid indian thing but i think i might but i think i might also be terribly terribly wrong. :)
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