So this is about how my life feels lately. Open one door, get shut out, open another. Which opens to more choices. This job thing has become rather tedious lately. There's really no way of telling what will work and what won't, so I keep turning in my applications and resumes, hoping to hit the jackpot and find that one door that actually opens for me. No luck so far, but what can I do except keep trying?
Today was rather full of ups and downs, first some ups as I left a couple places after turning my applications in, getting actually positive responses from both. Let me tell you, there is no feeling like hope. Later, at the place where I was most excited to speak with someone about a job, I got the worst response yet, and left feeling really angry and even embarrassed. All because of the wrong advice given to me when I called earlier. Not my fault. Not exactly anyway. But I left feeling so terrible and also (worst of all!) so suddenly devoid of hope about my situation. I noticed then this really strange tendency for my mood to completely affect the way I perceive the world. Earlier, as I drove home feeling awesome about good outlooks for the future, pretty much EVERYTHING I saw made me happy. I noticed how great Salt Lake is, how freaking wonderful bobbleheads in cars are, how perfectly fall-like it is these days, and how much I still had going for me, jobless or not. After being so jilted, I drove home hating pretty much everything, including all those people who have jobs and can only complain about having to go to work. At least you have work!
Really, nothing changed today. Except for my perspective on everything, and I must say, I prefer a positive outlook. I am learning though, that hope is an especially springy friend and always seems to bounce back, equally as full of life as before. Which is good, because during the hardest times, sometimes all you can do is hold onto those little strings of faith and wait for things to work out.
Oh, and by the way! Excellent news, if I may say so myself. Nicole, from ANTM 13 has made it to the top two. I'm just going to brag here, and say she has been my favorite since her very odd beginnings. Good to know I'm right :) If you have no idea what I'm talking about, shame on you. Or good for you? Something.
Love, Jennifer
2 comments:
good blog :)
ps. this is travis. just decided to pop in and see if you were still blogging. can't remember what my login was so now i'm anonymous.
i thought those were going to be your photography doors at first.
keep hoping.
i love you.
and i finally listened to you and watched like a million episodes of antm this weekend. this is so funny, i couldn't remember who you liked or if you ever told me, but i love nicole so far too! i'm glad she has made it to the end :)
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